Mistakes- Yes, Even Grave Ones- & How They Define Us

Most of us grow up assuming that things like housing and food are a simple given. As human beings, we live in society and so it isn't just a need, but a right to be provided with such things. As kids, we sleep in a bed that may be in a living room or a shared room, but nonetheless, it lay on a sturdy(ish) foundation with a roof overhead. We didn't have to wonder where our next meal would come from or how we'd pay rent, we just expect that such things would take care of themselves.

It wasn't until I turned 18 that I realized how fluid things are. It's almost like you grow up and realize, "oh shit, I thought things made sense, what happened?" Eighteen is when almost everyone you know is lost. Friends are trying to figure out where they belong, who they are and what the answer to life is. Maybe it was just me, but when I turned eighteen, I felt like the adults around me were still trying to figure things out. Everyone was second guessing themselves- maybe this was just my family, but it was almost like my growing up made everyone wonder if they were doing it right. If the move was the right decision. If they did a good job at being parents, and if not, did that mean they weren't good enough as people?

Now, as my brother nears 18, he's faced with the same harsh realities. You hear about people losing their homes, their jobs- but we always assume "that won't ever happen to me." It's a harsh reality, but people are people and sometimes they make mistakes. Sometimes those mistakes are followed up with harsh consequences, but nonetheless they happen for integral reasons. I didn't know what would happen when I walked out of my mom's; and while I want to say that I'd do it all again, I know I wouldn't. We make the choices that we do in response to our circumstances. If we could go back and make things right, what would the point have been? What would we have learned? Would the resulting person even be the same?

As much as our blind-spots can cripple us, they can attribute to some of our greatest strengths. Don't get me wrong, getting things wrong sucks, but they emphasize our growth in a way that perfection never could. If we knew everything before going into a situation, we wouldn't be given the opportunities to learn new things and mentally solidify integral principles. Think of Maoui from Moana- his tattooed tapestry of triumph is significantly more artsy than the scars that we acquire from trying to tame wild cats, but each one was attained by going through some sort of significant trial and overcoming his errors.

Yeah, I like that. Think of yourself as a God, creating your own tapestry of godliness. If someone walked up to you and asked "what makes you so great?" would you rather say "I have pretty eyes" or "I've been drawing for 10 years and I can sketch a recognizable picture of you in five minutes."?

Yes, mistakes offer wisdom even when they affect things as integral as homes and relationships. The kicker is that these mistakes must actually be learned from. If you keep making the same mistake over and over again, well you're insane. Sort of kidding, but you know how the quote goes.

If you're not willing to learn from mistakes, then yes, they will f up your life. You may lose people and you may lose your home over and over again until there's nothing left to lose. I've been living out of a car for the past month and a half and I know now that I never want to be in this position again. Maybe a van, with a bed in the back to call my own, but never without a proper landing spot. I had to learn this the hard way, but at least I learned it and now I can move onto the next step.

This isn't a test, let's not review mistakes time and time again. What errors are you sick of not learning from?

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